Let it flow...

Living in a constantly troubling fear about life, intentions of the people, unknown intentions of her own mind; her list is very long!

Indira is the person who was brought up by her parents and surrounding people with instructions, both said and unsaid from, which made her think 'I have to be perfect and good' no matter what happens!

She has been trying to be a good person and even a good citizen since then! Hardly did she know that so many 'goods' will confine her life to limited thoughts, opportunities, choices, and decisions too!

Her efforts to be 'a good person' soon transformed into a struggle, which she herself could not understand for years. Even now, she will not claim, she 'knows it all'! But she is trying to know and trying not to label her own self, or else it will be the 'get set' point of another struggle and she knows it!

'Struggle'!
This word broke her chain of thoughts and she was back in real time.

'Why do we struggle!?'

she thought to herself.

Why is this often associated with success?

Why struggle is labeled as an inevitable part of life?

Is it applicable to humans only or animals struggle too?

''struggle is such a hyped, overrated word!

"It is not a struggle what makes us stronger," she told herself."It is about efforts taken in a right direction towards a clear goal."

"Clarity is important."

"Which exactly I never had!"

Words came out of her mouth loudly and she realized she is doing exactly opposite of what she is thinking about, at the moment.

She is struggling, regardless of her opinions about the difference between efforts and struggle.

"Indu, enough! stop draining your mind.

Breath!"

If clarity and efforts towards the goal is what it takes to be happy and feel fulfilled, that is what needed to be done. And this time, I am going to make it!

No matter what she is thinking about, Whenever any negative thought enters her mind, she gets scared, as if the thought will become real immediately and she will not be able to save her life!

She has always been this; scared of her own life!

And 'I will win' is nothing more than a defensive mechanism to her!

She is still struggling...

But now she knows at least, that a life must flow the way it wants...

And she has started letting it flow...